Second Marriage Planning Tips

Here comes the bride, again - Congratulations! Whether you’re widowed or divorced (or even renewing vows), we absolutely love planning second marriage celebrations at Blue Linden! Just because it isn’t your first time down the aisle doesn’t mean the day is any less special. It may be a bit easier, as you already know what to expect and what not to freak out about, but more than likely, things have changed in the wedding world since the last time you said “I Do!” We’re here to help you sort through the differences and provide second marriage planning tips to make the day uniquely you and your fiance!

First thing to remember - it’s YOUR wedding. There are no set rules in place for any type of wedding, no matter if it’s a first or second marriage (or third or whatever number). Keeping that in mind, there are typically things about your first marriage that looking back you thought, “WHY?” and that’s completely understandable. Why did I stress over those place settings when people were more focused on having a good time? Why did I insist on inviting 300 people when I didn’t know half of them? Whatever the case may be, this is an opportunity to put hindsight into effect. And you can do that without sacrificing your desires and making sure that the day is focused on your and your significant other. It’s unfair to both parties in this new relationship if you just write this off as a “redo.” And we want to help - so check out our list of second marriage planning tips to get you started.

Shake It Up (if you want)

A second marriage doesn’t automatically mean you have to keep it simple or expected. Consider wearing color instead of white, or wear white, but make it a tea-length gown. If you want only your nearest and dearest to attend, consider a destination wedding in your dream locale and splurge on the adventure as opposed to the ‘things’ involved with the day. Skip the typical sit-down reception and have a cocktail party complete with your own signature drinks and food stations!

Reword The Invites

Typically, first marriages are paid for (at least partially) by parents of the couple, and they are therefore honored on the wedding invitations. Since the circumstances are normally different for a second marriage, consider phrases like “Together with their families” or “Jack and Jill are getting married,” or even “Little Bobby and Susie invite you to the wedding of their parents.”

Speaking of who’s paying, typically the engaged couple splits the cost of the wedding. This makes it much easier for decisions to be made; the less people who pitch in funds, the less opinions to be considered! This allows for the couple to make their wedding exactly the way they want it, which is why second marriage celebrations are typically considered less stressful affairs (at least during the planning process)!

Include Your Family

If you have kids, have them make up your wedding party, let them walk you down the aisle, ask them to do a reading (or toast at the reception), include them in your vows, or even have a special kids/parents dance - just to name a few ideas. There’s a number of ways to make sure everyone is included in the special day, if that’s what is right for your new blended family.

Registry Etiquette

While there’s no rule against having a registry for a second marriage, it’s kind of like having a baby shower for a second child - it’s usually considered unnecessary but not as taboo as before (especially if you already have a fully-stocked home). You can always consider honeymoon registry sites (or family-moon registry if you’re taking the whole gang), sending donations to a charity, asking attendees to pitch-in for a home improvement fund, or registering for fun stuff (like camping equipment or themed hosting supplies for future gatherings).

It can be noted that the same sort of mindset for registering - “unnecessary but not as taboo as before” - can also be applied to bachelorette/bachelor parties and bridal showers. While some may feel these events are not typical second marriage prenuptial celebrations, there are no rules that say you shouldn’t partake! Do what’s best for your circumstance!

Consider The Paperwork

Depending on the circumstances for the ending of your previous union, to get your marriage certificate for your second marriage you’ll need additional information: a divorce decree or a deceased spouse’s death certificate. A local county clerk can provide more specifics. Additionally, a prenuptial agreement may need to be addressed as well, given that most people in a second marriage are typically older and already have established lives; at the very least, it’s a conversation that the couple should have to protect the financial future of your children and put everyone’s mind at ease.

Blue Linden hopes these second marriage planning tips help you out during your process! We would absolutely love to coordinate your upcoming second marriage and we encourage you to reach out to us using the social media buttons below or going to our contact us section here on the website!